While in some communities and cultures seeing a psychologist is normal, in others it is still considered taboo. Living in Hungary now, there are few people I know who have ever seen a psychologist, and not many more who would even consider going to one. Often times I get a response along the lines of: “I can fix my problems on my own”, or “I’m not crazy”. This is even more prevalent when those in relationships have issues and feel they don’t need any outside help; that if they can’t solve their problems on their own then they shouldn’t be in a relationship at all. What people don’t often take into consideration is that seeing a psychologist doesn’t mean you are “crazy” or “messed-up”. We go to the dentist and the gynecologist for yearly check-ups and physicals, so why wouldn’t we also check our mental health?

For answers to some commonly asked questions about psychologists and therapy, please see below.*

So how do you know when you should see a psychologist? I personally believe everyone should see one at some point in their lives, but definitely if you feel you have built up emotional or physical trauma, stress that effects your daily life and routine, problems or conflict with family or friends that you don’t feel can be resolved, constant issues and stress with a partner you love, or when you have any sort of negative self-talk, pain, or prolonged sadness. If you have any physical conditions such as panic attacks, shortness of breath, heart palpitations, or any physical symptoms or pain – please contact your medical provider immediately.

Once you have chosen to see a psychologist, you need to pick a psychologist that you want to work with. This can depend on many factors, including location and price. But beyond that, you have to pick someone you feel comfortable with, but also whose therapy is going to align with what you need. Seeing a psychologist is similar to dating – you need to find someone you have chemistry with and whose values align with yours. Some questions you should ask a psychologist are, What do they specialize in? How many years’ experience do they have? What is their approach to therapy? When I saw a psychologist last year, we were working on the anxieties and stressors in my current life. She believed in sticking to the present moment and used CBT (cognitive behavior therapy) to help with my anxiety. CBT is a form of therapy which relies on changing your reactions and behavior to certain stimulus. For example, I would get very anxious when something didn’t go the way I expected, and every week we worked on taking that problem and changing the way I reacted – we did this by talking about my emotions, and then seeing if I could attach positive emotions to that action. Eventually I learned to not react so harshly to what I perceived as negative stimulus in my life.

So let’s say you have found a psychologist, you have chemistry with them, and you are ready to make a commitment – so what do the first few sessions look like? Typically the first two to three sessions are about the patient sharing their life story, or rather the important information pertaining to what they feel their problem is. It is okay if you don’t know exactly why you are seeing the psychologist – you can talk about the things that bother you, cause hardship, or induce stress, and your psychologist can use the information to get to the core of the problem. After all, that’s why you are seeing them in the first place! Depending on why you are there, your time with a psychologist can range anywhere from six months to up to two years. That’s a pretty long time to invest so much time and money. So what are the benefits of seeing a psychologist? We have put together 5 reasons why seeing a psychologist can provide you benefit in your daily life:

1.       Objective viewpoint

We often get advice about our problems and situations from friends and family – but is it objective advice? Usually not. And the people that are closest to us often love and care about us the most, so while their advice is usually given to be helpful, it is often clouded by their feelings towards us or their emotions. Going to a psychologist means you have a third person perspective of your situation – someone who knows nothing about you prior to your sessions, and someone who is emotionally un-attached. Besides the fact that they are highly qualified to help you solve your problems, them being detached means they can give clear advice and direction which will actually be in your best interest.

2.       New topics

A psychologist is great at analyzing information – specifically all of the information that you tell them. Your psychologist should ask deep and thought-provoking questions, but also simple questions that make you think about an aspect of your life that you haven’t thought of before. They are there to connect the dots and make connections between aspects of your life that you weren’t able to manage yourself. The whole point of going to a psychologist is that they make you think about a problem in a new way and bring up topics you didn’t know were relevant. Sometimes, we bury our issues deep down to the point where we don’t even think those issues affect our daily lives - but they do, and the psychologist is there to help bring those out and help you heal from past traumas or underlying stressors.

3.       New techniques

Psychologists have extensive training in not only how to speak to and understand their patient’s problems and find solutions, but they also learn a variety of techniques that can help their patients. These techniques can range from breathing exercises that help with stress relief, written outlines that support openness and discussion of underlying topics, or even hypnosis, which can help you get into a hypnotic state and bring up memories you have otherwise blocked. Whatever the reason for being in therapy, a psychologist will evaluate and understand your needs and teach you new techniques which can help you open up within the session, or treat some of your pains outside of the sessions.

4.       Goal setting

Although venting to your friends can be very helpful and bring relief, seeing a psychologist is a longer process that typically involves weekly sessions. The benefits of this, is that you have someone that you know you will be talking to every week and who you can work on your problems with longer term. This allows you and your psychologist to set goals – whether that means decreasing the intensity of a phobia over three months’ time, or talking about your father passing without being too overwhelmed. Everyone has different limits and needs, and your psychologist can work with you to set goals on a regular basis. This also keeps you accountable and stick to the treatment plan.

5.       Turn theory into practice

When we think of homework, we think about sitting at our desk at home trying to figure out tough math problems while wishing we were hanging out with our friends. Homework, in the sense of therapy, is similar in that it is often regular and given after every session. But what’s different about this homework is that it can come in all forms, including written, oral, or even certain activities or behavior practices you need to do. It is always based on your treatment plan and translates what you learn in therapy into the real world so you can apply it. This is also great practice for whatever you are trying to overcome, and whatever the outcome of the homework, you can go back to your psychologist and discuss with them your thoughts and feelings. That way you can learn and grow from the experience. Ensuring you are mentally healthy is equally important to ensuring you are physically healthy, so seeing a psychologist is a great way to get on track. Not everyone has deep-rooted issues that cause huge emotional damage, but even stress or anxiety in your life can have an effect. It is important that we check in with ourselves, and get the advice of someone qualified to ensure we remain emotionally and mentally healthy. Mind and body are connected and it is important we spend time healing both.

For 1-1 coaching sessions on how to find a psychologist, or any other topic, please reach out to us here or at doubletake.lifestyle@yahoo.com.

*A few commonly asked questions about psychologists:

What is the difference between a psychologist and psychiatrist? A Psychologist has a PhD in psychology, meaning they can help you treat your emotional ailments, struggles, and even phobias and stressors. A Psychiatrist has a medical degree, meaning they can prescribe medication if needed and specialize in the diagnosis and treatment of mental illness.

What is the difference between and counsellor and a psychologist? While a psychologist has a PhD in psychology, a counsellor can have a wide range of background. Typically, a counsellor will obtain a master’s degree in counselling or equal certification.

How long is a session? A session is typically about 50 minutes long, but some sessions can range between 60 and 75 minutes if needed.

How much does it cost? In Hungary the range is between 8,000 and 15,000 Hungarian forints an hour, whereas in the states it ranges on average from 150 to 300 dollars a session, but can be as much as 400 dollars for someone very specialized in the industry.

Is the information you say in a session with a psychologist confidential? Yes, a psychologist has to keep what you say confidential. If they become stuck on an issue you have, they might ask for advice from a peer, but they will keep it anonymous. The only time a psychologist can share information is if they believe the patient is going to hurt themselves or others, in which case they are obligated to report it to the authorities.