MEET THE PARENTS PART 1: THE ANTICIPATION

I remember it like it was yesterday...the first time my parents were invited over to my boyfriend (at the time)'s house. We were very young but a sudden opportunity presented itself (a rent-free apartment) and we made the decision to move in together. It was time for our parents to meet for the first time. I knew his mom and dad, he of course knew mine, but we never had the opportunity for a big family gathering. I was super nervous, worried about whether they would get along, if they would even like each other- what my parents might say to embarrass me or themselves. Of course the meeting went just fine, no naked baby pictures surfaced, I was clearly worried about nothing at all. Even though the relationship did not work out, in the end it resulted in me moving out and back in with my parents fairly soon after, but my ex boyfriend and I are still great friends even after 20-some years.

Almost 3 decades later I am in a similar situation, except I am on the opposite side now. My oldest daughter is moving in with her boyfriend and we are invited to meet his parents. Not just me as the mother, but also my parents, (the grandparents), as well. Oh boy! Now I am the one who could completely ruin it for my daughter if I do not behave. Or if my parents don't behave. We are a very energetic, opinionated family, who never shy away from a good argument or a heated political exchange. If a debate starts not sure it can be stopped...

What happens if we do not like each other? What if we have nothing in common at all? We live in two different worlds, us in Southern California, and the "potential in-laws" in a small city in the Hungarian countryside. But let's just say we actually get along well, should we even get close? What if the kids' relationship doesn't work out? In the past, I tried to be very careful not to get too close to my children's boyfriends and girlfriends. For one, they are all so young and relationships can simply come and go. I also learnt the hard way not to get too attached. If you are lucky, you like both the chosen love interest of your child and their parents as well. But sometimes you actually like the parents more than the boyfriend/girlfriend. And let's not even mention the drama over becoming best girlfriends with my brother's exes. So, who knows what will happen, and I guess there is only one way to find out; let's take the drive down to the countryside and Meet The Parents! #mommyknowsbest

My boyfriend and I have been together for 2 years now. We have moved in together. So what's the next logical step? The meeting of the parents. This weekend meet was planned months in advance, with careful consideration of everyone's schedules. After much deliberation, my boyfriends parent's decided to invite my family down to where they live and stay the weekend. The invitees are my mother, sister, and grandparents. I tried to calm my nerves by focusing on all the positive aspects:

1. My family likes to drink, his family likes to drink. 

2. My family likes to eat, his family likes to eat. 

3. Alcohol. 

With these in mind, I remained hopeful that everyone would remain pleasant and "politically correct" (pun intended), ie not discuss sensitive topics such as politics or religion, which I knew would be issues not agreed upon if brought up. 

Maybe you're thinking, 'why should I care so much'? But it matters. If this is someone you (might be) spending the rest of your life with, and the in-laws don't get a long with each-other- it will be years and years of negativity and unhappiness that puts a damper on the already hard lives of young couples trying to make it in a world where relationships are not longer sacred. I think it also matters so much to me because, as hard as it is for an emotionally-challenged person to admit, I really kinda sort of like my boyfriend (okay, love, but you get the point). And because of that, it would make me really sad to know that our parents don't like being around each-other. Luckily, I really like my boyfriends parents, they like me a lot (so they say) and my boyfriend likes my family and they like him (my grandmother, especially, who I think is a little obsessed). So with caution, but a positive attitude, we make the long, 2-hour trip down to Celldomolk, where my boyfriend's parents live, praying in the car to whatever god or spirit exists that the weekend goes off without a hitch.  #dianasays

Stay tuned for next weeks post to find out if everyone made it out in one piece...